Reviewed on 2009 December 22
Predictable crap about a crazy woman stalking her boss, with much of what you’ll see roadmapped out before it happens.
Derek Charles (Idris Elba) and his wife Sharon (Beyoncé Knowles) are living the sweet life. He’s a high-powered executive and the family just moved into a huge house, with a wood floor alone that probably cost more than my first place. A co-worker jokes at one point that Derek must have a horseshoe stashed somewhere, and he has a point. Their baby isn’t very old and Sharon already snapped back like a rubber band. I mention that only to underscore that Derek, a decent guy, would be a bonehead to cheat, and in this regard he’s no dummy. Unfortunately that doesn’t stop an unhinged temp, Lisa (Ali Larter), from trying to poach Derek. From the first bit of moody and vaguely spooky music as she flashes her blue eyes at him, we know this will not end well. She sizes him up and decides she is going to have him, spouse or not. Derek didn’t get this memo: at the office Christmas party he still has enough sense to rebuff her, despite a mix of drinks that would topple most men. This is when she really loses it.
Wisconsin doesn’t have this much cheese and its Swiss doesn’t have as many holes as the plot. You see where this is going, partly because of the silly dialogue and because classics like Fatal Attraction went there first. The other problem is that it’s as subtle as a bag of hammers and relied on dumb actions of the characters and cliches to get the job done. I think the only really redeeming thing was the faithfulness of the Idris Elba character. The whole loony-temp-goes-for-her-boss-like-a-crazed-weasel thing has been done before, but usually the guy caves. It’s still not enough to make this merit a second viewing.
One chocolate morsel and a dirty martini.